This video explores an aspiring comedian's journey, from the initial desire to be funny to the challenges of self-doubt and the pursuit of validation.

[102:21-102:47]

Speaker expresses the initial goal of wanting to know if they could be funny, highlighting the need for encouragement and the desire to make people laugh.

The big, the big thing for me starting out and, is I wanted to know if I could be funny. Like, I wasn't as concerned about finding my voice as much as I needed the encouragement of like, "Do I have the capability to make people laugh?" Because I remember I was at one of my first, first open mics, and I was sitting, waiting, you know, put your name in the bucket, and you, you know, you're waiting for them to call your name.

[102:47-103:13]

Speaker describes a particularly bad performance at an open mic, where anyone could perform, and the performer's lack of comedic talent was evident.

And this was one of those open mics where, like, anyone off the street can just walk in and put their name in a bucket and, and get up. And I was watching someone on stage who has had no business being on stage, who ha- who you could, you could just tell, anyone can tell, like, they did not have it, and they probably will never, ever have it, because they, it was like, "What am I watching right now?" Hm.

[103:13-104:12]

Speaker reflects on the bad performance, questioning their own potential for comedy and contemplating the possibility of lacking self-awareness like the performer.

And I remember thinking, sitting there, not in a cocky way, just as a student of comedy, and having worked in comedy for years before I performed myself, I had some experience, and some, you know I had an opinion at least. And I remember watching this guy on stage. You talk about imposter syndrome and stuff, um, that I, I was watching this guy on stage, and I went, "Okay." My wheels are turning. I'm like, "Why is this guy on stage? Well, he thinks he's funny, or he can be funny. What makes him think he can be funny? Because this is, there's, he's not even telling jokes. Well, his, people at work probably told him he's really funny." Right. "And his family probably told him he's really funny. So, he thought, well, I am really funny and now going to go do standup." And I, and then my next thought was, "Well, if people at work tell me I'm funny-" " and my family tells me I'm funny-" Uh-oh. " like, oh, my God, am I gonna, am I that guy?" "And I don't even have the self-awareness to realize I'm that guy?" And it was like, send me, like, in a spiral, you know?

[104:12-104:37]

Speaker shares the need for validation and building confidence through small successes in their early comedy career, emphasizing the importance of even a few laughs.

Yeah. Um, so in the beginning, like, I just wanted validation that I had the potential to be funny. Like, if I got one or two laughs, I don't, you know, ou- out of a five-minute set, or however, you know, when I was starting out, however long you did, I was like, "Okay, the potential is there." The goal is to have them laughing every 10 seconds for the whole five minutes, but I got two laughs. That means I said something funny, you know, and you just kind of have to, like, build on that, you know?

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